WW - Myths and Misperceptions...

 

The following shows this weeks Wordful Wednesday topic:

 

MYTHS ABOUT WOMEN

Be Superwoman - Do it ALL             Women Cannot be Scriptorians

Be SOMEONE - Work in a Career       

To be Beautiful you must be - skinny, pretty, fashionable

     Being a Homemaker is drudgery        Women are not equal to men         

Children are Oppressive - Limit how many you have

What myths have you overcome in your life? What misperceptions have you had that you realize now are wrong? And most importantly, what are you doing about changing those myths and misperceptions in your life and the lives of those around you?

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What myths have I overcome in my life...

hmmm...Well...I never saw being a homemaker as drudgery.  I guess because my mom seemed like she had it all...she stayed at home but was involved in church, clubs, and classes like tole painting and institute.  I never thought that women are not equal to men...in fact my dad rarely got mad, unless we were being somehow rude to our mother or wouldn't do what she asked the first time she asked it.  And my mom worked just as hard as my dad in many areas...she still likes to mow the lawn herself!  I learned that women CAN be scriptorians...when I was on my mission a member of the bishopric actually asked Sister Banner a question about doctrine from the pulpit...she was most definitely a scriptorian.  To be someone--work in a career...never had that as a thought, though I do admit to feeling 'mommy brain' once in a while.  

So what myth, of those listed, do I have a problem with?  Perhaps the one about doing it all.  I think I'll just leave it at that...because I still believe it can all be done! 

What misperceptions have you had that you realize now are wrong...

Well...when I was a younger mother, my many friends would tell me how their child was getting into everything and how hard it was to stay organized.  I began to believe that because my child really didn't get into anything and that because I was fairly organized, that I must be, indeed, a bad mother.  I began to let things go a little, so I could be less organized. {I am feeling that pit in my stomach as I write this, because I've never admitted it before}.  Suddenly, I wasn't just pretending to be unorganized.  I was seriously in trouble.  It was like a gift had been taken away from me, and I had to earn it back.  My son began getting into the markers which had always been easily accessible before, but now he was not only getting into them, he was drawing ALL OVER HIMSELF. 

The myth that we must be just like the other moms in order to 'feel' like a good mom, is just so wrong. It's something I have to fight with myself a lot, and to figure out that we are each doing our best is all that really matters, as long as I'm focusing on what I think is best for me and my family.  One of my turning points was when I was called a Nazi Mom.  I realized then that I felt good about the routines and structure that we had in place and that while she saw me as very strict, I saw her as too easy going...and that was o.k. because we were just each trying to do our best.

And most importantly, what are you doing about changing those myths and misperceptions in your life and the lives of those around you?

The most important thing to change the myths and misperceptions we have is to get to know ourselves. Like the picture above, we need to listen to our heart! We must be true to who we are, true to those around us, and true to our Father in Heaven.  He created us, he knows us better than we know ourselves, and if we can find out what he sees in us, it won't matter one bit what anyone else thinks.  

The other day I went to a workshop aimed at helping women be their best selves.  It's true that we struggle more than men do at seeing and believing in the best of ourselves.  We worry if we do something fantastic that other people will think we are showing off, and yet we compare ourselves to everyone who is doing something fantastic.  It's a no-win situation.  One of the speakers took us through all the areas we rate ourselves in...and there are a lot of areas!  Then she told us to get rid of our scorecards all together.  Another speaker told us "All that is necessary is to begin" and that meant a lot to me. Another speaker had us list all of our abilities that we could turn into talents.  I noticed some people were writing down quite a decent list, while other people made no list at all and looked pretty uncomfortable with the assignment.  I went to one class about decorating our homes and she didn't have one single picture that looked anything close to how I've decorated my home and I had to just say to myself...that's not who I am and be done with it.

So how do we get to know ourselves?  We take the time to listen to our inner thoughts.  We picture ourselves doing fantastic things then we BEGIN.  We look at ourselves in the mirror and smile. We read scriptures and pray and go to church.  And to find out more, read Happiness, Your Heritage by Elder Uchtdorf.