wowzers

Today I ran into the grocery store to return a dvd.  Well, we had returned it on Saturday but had inadvertently put in the Looney Tunes disc instead of Prince of Persia which wasn't all that bad, at least the parts I was awake for!  Anyway (said with a long drawl) the Sara Lee stocker guy was standing at the desk chatting with an employee and he said to me, "Are you Kathryn?"  I'm sure his self esteem totally took a boost from my 110% blank look.  "Help me!"  I said and as the words came out of my mouth I recognized him as Ryan from my younger years. (Last name still eludes me.)

I think we were in Kindergarten and some other elementary grades together.  I'm fuzzy on the details, but I am clear on one singular memory.  His birthday party.  I think he must have been turning 6 or 7 and I was invited.  Birthday parties were few and far between for me so this was a big deal.  My mom took me to the store and I picked out some paints for him.  As the day of the party grew closer, the more nervous I became.  Looking back I think I just was afraid that I wouldn't know what to do or say, and what if I didn't know any body else!  I think, now, that he probably invited the entire class.  That day, I hid in my bed and said I was NOT going to go.  My mom did not take kindly to this.  After what must have been some serious coaxing I went.  All I remember of that party is that we were to play a game where we had to keep our balloon in the air.  No idea if I knew what to do or say or if I knew anybody else.

But I must have to remember it for some reason.  And today is not the first time I have thought about that over the years.  I think it's because it wasn't so bad and that I did  something that was hard for me to do.  I have faced those similar feelings a thousand times and sometimes I've "gone to the party" and other times I've not and regretted it.  Funny how we have these little jogs in our memories once in a while!